Anyone who knows me well knows that I have a rather clashing set of interests. When it comes to most things, I don't really like many things that are highly commercialized and commonplace. The things I do like are generally polar opposites. I like things that are extremely clean, functional (though not industrial), somewhat futuristic, and nerdy. Think IKEA, Star Trek, Apple products (especially my iPod touch and Macbook), Tupperware, and my profession of choice, graphic design, among other things. On the other hand, I love soft, girly frills and embellishments, antiques, and Victorian and Edwardian history. Think Anne of Green Gables, tea, fancy clothes and accouterments, and the English language in all its glory. I don't exactly know what draws me to such differing styles, but I have no doubt that both sides were largely influenced by my parents.
My dad introduced my two brothers and I to Star Trek (and Star Wars for that matter) as children. He used to tape every episode when it aired on TV in the 90s. At the time, I hated it. I used to dread having to watch it. Andrew, my older brother, got into it pretty quickly though, and eventually Jonathan and I followed suit. My dad and brothers nerdy sensibilities grew on me, and I soon found myself chatting happily about my favorite character (Counselor Deanna Troi). My brothers and I quickly picked characters that each family member was most like! Dad, the head of the household and coincidentally bald, was our Captain Picard. Mom had to be Doctor Crusher, in her caring, matronly way. Her hair was the same color and style as Doctor Crusher's in the early 90s! Andrew was the brainy one, and he LOVED Lt. Commander Data. Jonathan had a strange fixation with Lieutenant Worf, though I'm not really sure how he is or ever was like him. I, in my empathetic manner and long dark tresses, just instantly connected with Counselor Troi. We watched The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, and eventually Voyager as a family. I have fond memories bonding with them while watching or talking about the show. Even my mom got into it at times.
Naturally, my mom was the main influence on my more feminine interests. As the only daughter, and only granddaughter to my beloved grandparents, I felt so special getting dressed up in pretty dresses and having my mom put ribbons and bows in my hair. I will never forget the first time we watched Anne of Green Gables together. I was probably 8 years old, or so. We were close friends with the Dee family when we lived in Minnesota. They had three boys and a girl, so one New Year's Eve, the dads and boys all went over to their house and the moms and girls stayed at our house. The boys played video games and watched action flicks, and we had an Anne of Green Gables marathon. I was the only non-redhead, but I was instantly mesmerized. Everything was so pretty and pristine. I dreamed of being in Anne's world.
It took me awhile to come to the realization the full extent of these influences on my personality. Even in college, I had difficulty discovering "my style." I was drawn to design elements that were grungy and distressed. Cities intrigued me. I was also drawn to flowers and PINK and country elements. I still haven't quite found a way to combine these two sides of me. I think it's good though, because it means I can design sites like this and things like the header to this blog.
Truth be told, I'm probably most drawn to the latter of the two. If you were at our wedding or even saw pictures, it reflects this. I do my utmost to incorporate my interests in decorating without making things too overly feminine for Nate. I have no wish for him to resent me or being in our home because he doesn't feel restful or at home in it. I want our home to be a happy haven for both of us, and I think, I hope, I've accomplished this. Nate never complains. For instance, I adore pink. I always have, save a rebellious anti-pink phase I went through in high school. We used pink and green for our wedding colors and I wear it quite a lot. However, you won't see much of it in our home except a few places in the kitchen and bedroom.
Maybe someday I will be able to look back on this post after having accomplished combining the two. Or maybe I'll be drawn completely to one over the other. I do know that my style will continue to develop and change. It's a journey I look forward to experiencing.
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